| ||
| ||
| Control-Weight.Info | |
|
|
|
|
Im Not Fat, Im Fluffy
A distorted body image is one of the symptoms that define anorexia and related eating disorders. Patients may be painfully thin but still see themselves as fat while they continue to cut calories, over-exercise, purge, or use enemas in an effort to lose more and more weight. Those of us who enjoy normal weight often also suffer from a warped view of our physical selves. Like the old carnival house of mirrors, we fail to see the true reflection of our bodies because of an inner eye that focuses on the elements we hate: sagging arms, nobby knees, saddlebag thighs, a roll of belly fat. That personal distaste for certain body parts is what drives slender, attractive, healthy individuals, despite the adverse reactions of family and friends who see no need for change, into cosmetic surgery. Those of us who are overweight also display selective vision. We tend to avoid full-length mirrors, preferring to focus on just our upper body and face. When we do catch a full glimpse, we suck in our stomachs and look at ourselves sideways, trying to convince ourselves that we don't look as overweight as the scales so nastily suggest. We believe that our clothes shrank in the wash or that the size tags are in error. In our mind's eye we see ourselves as we yearn to be and linger long on the fantasy of how great we will look when we can get into our favorite outfit. So no matter our weight, our body image frequently fails to reflect what is in the mirror but represents what is held in our mind's eye. The closer we can approach to the differing views being compatible, the more comfortable we will be in ourselves and the more valuable any changes we seek to make. You may have gained, and lost, an appreciable amount of weight several times on your life, as many of us have. There were undoubtedly times, on your way up and down the weight ladder, when your appearance and your self-image diverged. This can be a critically dangerous time. If you are on a diet and losing, but still see yourself as fat, you become anxious: "This diet isn't working," and the chances of your just giving up become significant. If you are gaining and still see yourself as thin, you ignore the need to take immediate action until one day you can't button any of your clothes. You look at the scale in confused surprise: how did this happen without my noticing it ten or fifteen pounds ago? To permanently control our weight requires a constant awareness of our body in all of its full reality. It doesn't matter if we want to be model-thin, enjoy a middle ground, or even have no emotional distress at remaining pleasantly plump, we need to be aware of our external presentation in order to accurately internalize all aspects of our appearance. An accurate self-appraisal of your image-in-the-world makes so many decisions easier: should I eat dessert? Should I drive over to the gym? Should I take a walk or start that new thriller I've been dying to read? Because you're aware of what needs to be done, and what is allowed, you shake the burden of guilt off your shoulders and can truly enjoy the activities you choose to pursue. Your mental and physical efforts are synchronized which avoids self-destructive vacillation -- "Should I or shouldn't I?" - and the later self-disgust when you feel you made the wrong choice. How do we train ourselves to coordinate our self-perception with our self-presentation? It is undoubtedly a difficult task to accomplish. How many times have you been astonished to learn that others see your words and actions in a totally different light than you meant to convey? We judge others, and they judge us, by external criteria. I am only completely and intimately knowledgeable about one person in the world, me, because I am privy only to the internal criteria of myself. We are now going to try to turn ourselves inside out in order to look at ourselves with both an internal and external view. Here are some personal characteristics and attributes. Since we are focused on weight and body image, the primary listing relates to that. Since you're going to a lot of effort to get this information, and to create confusion in your respondents about what is your primary area of concern, I suggest you add the additional areas. Physical: Height Weight Shape General Appearance Hips Chest Arms Legs Posture Ways You Move Attractiveness Grooming Hairstyle Wrinkles Looks What Age Voice Age-Appropriate Clothes Taste In Clothes Make-Up Expertise Bearing Teeth Fingernails Appearance - Strongest Points Appearance - Biggest Shortcomings Other: Usual mood Politeness Attitude Confidence Level Empathy Level Honesty Rating Personality -Strongest Points Personality - Biggest Shortcomings Dealing with People -- Strongest Points Dealing with People --Biggest Shortcomings Next to each personal quality, write down one to three adjectives you feel best describe you on that facet of yourself. Now give the list to several friends, your spouse, relatives, coworkers. Tell them you're involved in a project or survey and make sure they can submit it anonymously. Having it completed by someone you think doesn't like you can be the most revealing of all! How closely do all the lists overlap? Typically, there will be substantial repetition in a number of areas. There will likely be divergence between people who know you very well and those who only see a certain side of you, at work, at school, in business. Now combine the lists, deleting the repetitions, so that you have anywhere from a few words to dozens of words to describe your public persona. Since we are primarily interested here in weight management, concentrate on the descriptors that relate to your physical attributes. Do others see you as you see yourself or are there a few shockers showing up? Focus on those and try to ferret out the source of the contradictions. Are you misleading yourself about the way you look or are you unconsciously facing the world in a manner designed to create a certain image? Do you focus on your "good points" - a small waist you cinch tight with a belt - and forget about other areas - your hips look enormous in comparison? Do you fake something imperfectly such as a hairpiece, a shoe lift, padded underwear? Have you convinced yourself that long, flowing clothes, or oversized suits, make you look slim? Do you always study your face in the glow of bathroom warming lights to convince yourself that the wrinkles don't really show? What can be very gratifying and self-affirming about this exercise is that much of what is written about you is far more tolerant and non-judgmental than how you describe yourself. You are your own biggest critic because you know yourself so well - that old internal criteria stuff. You want to be good, you want to be perfect, but you are acutely aware of your weaknesses and dark secrets. This is where balance can be so nurturing: knowing how others see you can help you make any changes you want to pursue. You can start to emphasize certain aspects of yourself while discarding the tricks that everyone saw through. If you want to modify your appearance, lose weight, build strength, it will be valuable only if it is built on the reality of where the internal and external converge. You are considerably more likely to attain your goals if they arise out of where you are and lead naturally to where you want to be. One more side effect of this little exercise: you find out that no one in the whole world is as interested, or as focused, on you as you are! Even close friends and family may have difficulty in finding descriptors for you: "I just never really thought about it." Of course they didn't because they were too busy concentrating on themselves. Once you really grasp this concept, it can be incredibly freeing. You can start to lose that self-consciousness that tells you others are studying and judging you. That standing-out-from-the-crowd vulnerability can start to fade. That "I can't go looking like this" panic can start to wane. And as you start to realize that your weight and appearance are the primary focus of only yourself, you can start to understand that whatever your physical shape reflects, it is your appreciation which is vital, not other people's. Manage your weight, and manage your life, for yourself - not for those others "out there" who don't even notice. Virginia Bola is a licensed psychologist and an admitted diet fanatic. She specializes in therapeutic reframing and the effects of attitudes and motivation on individual goals. The author of The Wolf at the Door: An Unemployment Survival Manual, and a free ezine, The Worker's Edge, she recently completed a psychologically-based weight control book: Diet with an Attitude: A Weight Loss Workbook. She can be reached at http://www.DietWithAnAttitude.com
Weight Loss in the News:
Weight-Loss - Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
The Most Effective Fat Burning And Muscle Building Workout That Takes Just 13 Minutes Most people who want to burn off some excess pounds and tighten and tone their bodies simply don't have 2 hours each day to spend in the gym performing the bodybuilding style workouts that most "fitness experts" recommend.Plus, these workouts consist of exercises and techniques that do not exercise the body in the way it is normally used so they end up building a somewhat unusable strength. After WLS: Goodbye Self-Loathing! Hello Self-Loving! You won't believe what happened to me today!I was getting ready for work and saw myself naked in the full-length mirror and I didn't hate what I saw! I actually gave myself an unrehearsed slightly passive self-compliment "You don't look bad today."The reason this is monumental is because most of the time when I look in the mirror I do not like what I see and I give myself harsh criticism. Obesity is Big Business Obesity and overweight, weight reduction and weight management therapies, miracle weight loss pills are everywhere. Open the newspaper, switch on the T. Whats Really Behind the Milk Diet? The purpose of this article is not to scrutinize, vilify, or verify the so-called Milk Diet. There are a number of resources available both online and offline which can help you and your physician decide which of the several diet plans or personalized weight loss programs is right for you. Changing Your Eating Habits We are bombarded with advertisements pushing delicious looking, fat filled, and obesity producing food in our faces every single day. We hear it on the radio; see it on TV and on billboards and even in newspapers. Obesity, Whats The Big Deal Nowadays, so much of the public is obese (fat) that it is the"norm". So much so, that we are starting to ignore thisepidemic. Scientific Research Shows Why Diets Dont Work, If You Want to Sustain Long Term Weight Loss To say that dieting rarely leads to sustainable weight loss isn't particularly controversial, scientific research shows that 90% of people who try to lose weight by dieting fail. Did you know that dieting is a multi-billion dollar industry, and that there are over 25,000 books on diets, many of which contain advice that clearly contradict each other. Cross Training One of the biggest misconceptions about exercise is that there is "one" program that works for someone all the time. People think that they need to get on a particular workout program and just keeping doing that program over and over again. Planning Your Diet We have plans for everything these days. That is how we can fit 100 different things into each day. Losing Weight: Healthier Wallet Lose Weight - Get A Break ---------------------------------------- The American Obesity Association (AOA) wants to give new meaning to getting a deduction. Losing weight should get you a deduction. The Psychology of Weight Loss: Part 2 - How are You Motivated? New Years Resolutions do not work because you are really not motivated when you think you are. On the surface you may be, but deep down you are not. How Does Phentermine Work? Learn Pros & Cons Of Phentermine For Weight Loss Phentermine, like many other prescription drugs, works with chemicals called neurotransmitters in your brain. It actually stimulates your neuron bundles to release a particular group of neurotransmitters known as catecholamines, these include dopamine, epinephrine (formally known as adrenalin), and norepinephrine (noradrenalin). Abdominal Liposuction - When Diets Dont Work Abdominal liposuction refers to liposuction, or lipoplasty, that is performed on the torso area. Most candidates for this procedure have attempted a diet and exercise routine but are unable to achieve their goal of a flatter stomach. Health Secrets of Cayenne For many years, herbalists believe that Cayenne is the most useful herb on the entire planet. It's especially significant in the health aid of the entire digestive and circulatory system. Healthy Supplements Make Diet Pills Obsolete! Diet PillsTaking diet pills is definitely not an effective weight loss strategy, because as soon as you stop taking them, all the weight you lost will return with a vengeance, because.. Exercise: Essential The only absolute truth in the area of exercise and weight loss is this: Becoming more physically active will burn calories, and as long as you don't absorb those calories back by eating more, you will lose weight. Getting active and getting your muscles to burn more calories is an essential part of a weight management program. Fast Weight Loss and Exercise - Pay Now or Pay Them Later! Why have I allowed myself to get into this shape? Have you ever said that? With life comes responsibility and with decisions comes consequences. It's your choice today to do something positive. Mindfulness - The Key to Avoiding Overeating I made myself a sandwich today and thought I'd be efficient and do some work over lunch. I was brainstorming some ideas for my next article. Fat Is A Self-Inflicted Disease I just came back from three days in Las Vegas. What an eye-opener!The biggest, most lavish buffets in the world attract the biggest, most expansive people. Obesity and Weight Loss Surgery Let's face facts; obesity is ripe today in America and rising on a global scale in western civilisation - where are we going wrong. Being a health and fitness nut I would simply recommend eating a balanced diet and exercise often, but you've heard all that before, and it doesn't work for you, right? That's ok, losing weight is tough, especially for those who some doctors would class as morbidly obese, which are those people who weight 50-100% their ideal body weight.
|
| Home | Site Map |
| © 2006 |
